Mental Health and Writing
Hello again. I’m coming to y’all sooner than expected again, for one simple reason: the release date for Bewitched is again being pushed back. Doing this so early in my career pains me, but unfortunately, my mental health has made it difficult for me to write. The circumstances that led to me pushing my release date back in the first place led to a deep depression, one that strained my thoughts. Mental health is no joke, and while a lot of people don’t take it seriously, your own mind turning against you is crippling. The little voice that whispered ideas and guidance now spews venom that fills you with self-doubt and makes getting out of bed a Herculean task.
Anyone who’s struggled with mental illness knows that poor mental health isn’t an excuse to slack on responsibilities, but a disability that can make functioning near impossible. Days when I can write for hours and get lost in the world of my characters have become rare, and when I manage to open the document, lately all I can do is criticize what I see, while no new words come.
I am woefully behind on my writing. 2025 has been a rough year, which means my thoughts have been strained. If I hadn’t started working on Mesmerized back in 2024, it likely wouldn’t have been released when it was. Releasing it not only accomplished a lifelong dream of mine, but gave me a high that had me thinking I could write the sequel within three months.
For the time being, the cloud hanging over me is dissipating, partially because I did some research on my medication and found out the combo of meds that I was given can worsen mental health to the point of hallucinations and induce paranoia. Unfortunately, I’ve been experiencing both, as well as suicidal thoughts that made writing feel pointless, because I pondered if I’d even be alive by the time the book was due.
Do research on the medication you're prescribed, y'all. I cannot stress this enough. Trust your body and mind, and if something doesn’t feel right, speak up. Advocating for yourself is important, and in some cases, lifesaving.
As the medicine gets out of my system, my deep depression is replaced by intense anxiety, because that depression has messed up so much. The fog is disappearing, allowing me to see the wreckage left behind. I’ve never been a writer capable of pumping out multiple chapters a day, and I’ve been unable to be satisfied with the direction of Bewitched. Chapters have been planned, written, deleted, and reworked, just for the process to repeat itself. I want to do justice to Kamika’s story, but nothing feels right. She deserves better than what I’ve been capable of giving recently, and I fear that rushing it will only create a product that’s a disappointment to read and that I wouldn’t be proud to release.
I aim to have Bewitched out before Melting Point, and ideally, before the end of October. It’s not just a professional goal, but a personal one as well. My preorders are low—which contributed to my depression, because I’m annoyingly delicate—so this announcement will disappoint few. However, I apologize to those who are disappointed, and to ensure that Bewitched won't be pushed back again, I will only set the preorder date once the first draft is finished.
In the future, I'll give myself six months or more for novels over 50,000 words. In today's publishing world, authors are expected to release novels more frequently, but that isn't a realistic standard for many people, including myself.
That will wrap things up. I don't have much to say, as I don't want to go into specifics at this moment in time. But, I will say this. If you’re struggling with mental health, you aren’t alone. It’s said often by mental health professionals and those struggling with mental illness, because when you’re at your lowest, it feels like you’re all on your own. And if you’re a creative person who struggles with mental illness, and whose work is affected by it, remember that your worth isn’t tied to meeting a deadline or your productivity. The creative process isn’t a linear one; something I’ve had to be reminded of frequently lately.
I’ll close this out by encouraging anyone reading this to take care of themselves, to check on their loved ones, and once again to remember to research their medications. And, most importantly, the obligatory inclusion that the Crisis Hotline for the U.S and Canada is 988. If you need it, use it.
Until next time, dear reader
